I have a few things to discuss.  I turned 42 yesterday, and yet, I still feel like a kid most of the time.  I suspect it has something to do with the fact that I've never had children.  I wonder if rearing children changes one's state of mind in terms of perceived age.  I don't really act like a kid in many ways, or at least not in irresponsible ones...but in others I do.  I still have to fight myself to eat better, I'm lazy, and I tend to let things go if they don't need to be done right away.  On the flip side, I manage to stay employed, pay my bills, keep my wife happy, care for my animals and satisfy my musical goals in terms of production nearly every time.  I say "nearly" because I had expected to start writing and recording again in July...but it just didn't happen.  Then I figured it would be August, but...umm...yeah, not so much.  Here we are on 8/10/11 and I just started working on a song yesterday.  The next project will be a new recording by the last day of every month, and I think I"m going to start with September.  I need to get back into the flow and also have to work other necessary activities into my life; things I've previously discussed here.  

My decision to do a new song once a month instead of weekly or bi weekly, as I've done previously, is based on at least a couple of things.  First, I tend to focus on any given task and ignore everything else that I don't consider to be as important.  That's quite helpful with regard to accomplishing a goal; not so much with trying to maintain a reasonable level of balance in one's life.  So there's that.

Second, while I didn't see it so clearly at the time, doing a song every week rushes things.  It's less of a factor when the deadline is every two weeks, but I still feel the need to simply take more time with each production.  The idea will be to play with arrangements, different guitar parts and sounds, get better takes...just overall improvement at every level.  I also find myself thinking more as a songwriter than I have before, though that word has been the first I've used to describe myself for some time.  I want to see where this takes me and I want to give each step I take a little more time.

I also want to look deeper into myself on every level.  I really loved The Life & Times of Snuffy Wilson.  It was deeply personal, there are great songs and the whole thing, I think, came off really well.  But, there wasn't much in terms of social commentary or observation.  It was about one guy and what he thought about his life as he neared the end.  Interpretations was fun, but none of the material was mine.  This time out I want to dig further down. Perhaps not with every song - there's still something to be said for audio candy, so to speak - but when one is starting with something called FU, that is juuuuust a bit indicative of where I'm heading.

Incidentally, I know there are two pop songs out there that essentially have the same title.  I published the lyrics to my song on Facebook back in Jan 2010, and I wrote them sometime in 2009.  My version of this particular obscenity doesn't sound anything like either of the others.  

And, while we're talking about digging deeper and being a songwriter, I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm not going to pay a lot of attention to writing or arranging based on what I think will sell.  Truthfully, I always give that at least a bit of consideration, but I believe that this time out, I'm just going to let the song be its own master and do whatever the hell I think works.  

I think the songs will have fuller arrangements, be edgier, and have more of a rock feel.  Not every song, but it seems like that's where I'm going right now.  

Guess that's it for now.  Y'all take care.
 
 
 

I’m in the midst of taking a bit of a break from making music.  It’s not likely to be very long, but I feel it’s necessary for a few reasons. 
 
First, I’ve recently completed another deadline oriented project where I recorded and published a cover song at least every two weeks.  Some were posted sooner as they were finished.  One could make the argument that doing cover songs is easier than writing new material, but I’m not entirely certain that’s accurate.  The demands and difficulties are simply different.  When one composes something new, there isn’t an existing standard to which comparisons will automatically be drawn.  Yes, every piece of music has its roots somewhere and influences can be heard, but that’s not the same thing as recording a new version of a song that’s become embedded into our culture, like “Hotel California.” 
 
I haven’t been inclined to do many cover songs since beginning my journey as a solo artist, mainly because I’ve had far more interest in writing, recording and performing my own material for nearly as long as I’ve been practicing.  My first stringed instrument was bass guitar and I quickly started learning six string guitar as well so that I could write my own songs.  I’ve been in a few bands during my life and cover songs were part of our repertoire, but that’s never been where most of my energy and attention were focused.  So, coming back to doing other folks’ songs was a bit like starting over. 
 
In some ways, it’s harder for me to record a cover song than it is for me to write a new one.  Obviously, I’ve spent more time in my life working on the writing process.  My body of work reflects this.  So, I decided to try and create my own versions of these songs and still retain the spirit and/or essence of the original recordings.  Why would I even try to make a carbon copy?  I didn’t see any reason to do that.  On the whole, I think I was successful.  Some songs are better than others, as is always the case, and I have my personal favorites.  In my opinion, the best song of the collection is my version of “Long Black Veil.”  I love everything about it; the arrangement, the performances, and the way it hits me emotionally.  Y’all are free to come to your own conclusions.
 
The second reason for taking a break is that I need to make adjustments to my lifestyle.  Essentially, and aside from maintaining my wonderful relationship with my wife and caring for my animals, I’ve been focusing on music and little else for…well, for most of my life in some ways…but specifically, since 2008, there hasn’t been much time devoted to anything else.  When I’ve had a day job, it received the minimal attention necessary.  While I was “unemployed,” I channeled nearly everything I had to finding a way to make a living playing my stuff.  I was not successful, but I assure you that it wasn’t because of a lack of effort.  In any case, I’ve neglected other important aspects of living for far too long.  This includes something resembling exercise and my practice within the Jiyushinkan organization.  Thankfully, I can resolve the former by doing what I should with the latter. 
 
Essentially, I need to develop new habits.  I need to find the time to do things other than musical activities so that I can find some balance.  Part of this involves my health.  Let’s face it.  I’m a fat fucker.  I have not historically eaten properly, nor have I exercised regularly.  I need to do both, and part of that involves living differently.  I just came back from AZ, and while I did eat better, I did indulge in a few things that I normally don’t , or can’t get in WI.  Chocodiles come to mind.  I love those damn things.  However, I also exercised quite a bit.  In any case, part of taking some time away from a disciplined approach to music is making changes to my schedule and lifestyle. 
 
It is necessary.
 
Lastly, I just need a bit of time away from it, specifically away from the previously mentioned disciplined approach.  Don’t let anyone kid you.  Maintaining a certain level of skill takes work.  Improvement requires more.  It can be a grind, regardless of how much one enjoys the practice or activity in question.  Other issues arise when recording is involved…when that little red light comes on, getting just the right take is about 85% of the problem.  Mixing, getting the right levels…that plays into it as well, and just that end of things is really an art unto itself; one I’ve had to pursue out of necessity.  I’m damn sure not going to pay for studio time, an engineer or a producer until I’m certain that a reasonable amount of income will come from the product.  So, while it is something I love and enjoy, writing and recording is a lot of work. 
 
Breaks are necessary from time to time.
 
Moving forward, I expect my next project to be more rock oriented.  I’m not sure why, it just seems like that’s where I’m heading.  I also expect that I will adjust my production schedule to be less demanding…I’m thinking a minimum of one song every 30 days.  If something is ready sooner, I expect I will make it available. 
 
I guess that’s it for now.  Y’all take care.
 
 

Yeah, I know...I don't really post regularly here anymore.  I am active on Facebook, as you can see by the window in the top right hand corner of this page.  Feel free to find me there.  Now then, on with the show.
 
I recently had the following exchange on Facebook.  My comments are in the middle and I've eliminated the names of others, though the comments are, at this point, pretty much a matter of public record.
 
 
(friend of mine, and a great tacher) Great great day working w/serious, smart, committed singers. I've had many stepping stones jobs, often 2-3 at once. I hear what Johnny is saying "Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. If you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined." -Johnny Carson
 
(me) Yeah, sorry, but that doesn't always work for all of us. Sometimes one does what is necessary to make a living and pay for a roof over one's head.
 
(another Facebook user) Dont settle Todd. Find what you love and go for it. =)
 
 
At the risk of sounding like an asshole - and I'm reasonably familiar with that phenomenon - fuck you, Johnny Carson.  Most of the people in this world HAVE to continue doing jobs they don't enjoy.  Furthermore, even in the most satisfying occupations, I'm nearly certain there are aspects that aren't at all pleasant.  EVERYTHING has a down side, and that's not just the pessimist in me talking.  
 
But, that isn't the point I wish to make.  If people didn't continue in jobs they don't enjoy, I believe society would fall apart.  Think of all the necessary jobs that would simply never get done.  Trash men, people who do work in sewers, janitors, customer service folks, plumbers, just about any form of  manual labor…while any job probably has something enjoyable to be found other than the income it brings, who among us dreams of working in a cubicle for eight hours a day?  Does anyone ache to work behind a fast food counter?  Is there a single soul out there who wanted to grow up and be a prison guard?  Each of those jobs probably has some appeal, and perhaps there is even a person or two out there who can honestly say, "yes, Todd, I do that 5 days a week and love every fucking moment!"  If so, he/she would be the exception to the rule.
 
My point here is this:  the great majority of us do not get to live out our dream jobs.  Most of us find something to do that is something resembling tolerable that gives us a reasonable, steady source of income and hopefully find other outlets for whatever stirs our souls.  Believe me, I'd love to quit my job and chase the dream I've had for most of my life.  I've even been able to do that at least twice for extended periods of time as an adult.  However, eventually, reality came crashing in.  Dreams don't put food on the table, clothes on my back or a roof over my head.   While I may never entirely give up the hope of making a living with what fuels my passion, I still have to find a way to make money.  That's reality.  
 
I suppose I could give up some of the more extravagant things and live a spartan existence in pursuit of "the dream."  I could sell my house and most of my possessions and rent the cheapest apartment I could find and pursue music full time with all the energy I have.  I might - might - even be able to convince my wife to go along with this.  Let's say I couldn't.  Even though she's always been supportive of me and my art, I might be able to adjust to the idea of my life without her, if necessary.  Even if I did all that, there is still one inescapable fact.
 
I *still* need to make a living.   
 
As much as I love my music, I'm not willing to go live on the street for it.  At the very least, doing so wouldn't allow me to have the tools necessary for it, nor the means to provide and protect them.  And, here's another bottom line for you; a rather cold, inescapable fact that I became aware of years ago.
 
In order for me to make a living with my music - and that is my dream and what I love - there has to be a sufficient number of people willing to spend money on it and me.  
 
To date, there hasn't been.  Does that mean there never will be?  No.  Does that mean that I've given up entirely on it happening?  Not at all.  Does that mean that, in the meantime, I won't "settle" for another job, whether I enjoy it or not?  Fuck no.  
 
In my opinion, that's reality, folks.  I've been called a pessimist by many people, including my amazing wife.  I don't believe I am, at least not entirely.   I consider myself to be a realist.  I've often said that I hope for the best, but expect the worst…that's called being prepared.  
 
One final thought…this has all been written from the only perspective I have - my own.  That doesn't include children because my wife and I choose not to have any.  I'm fairly certain that the need to provide for them would take precedence over any dreams either of us might have and that plenty of people in this world do shitty jobs every day to ensure the survival of their families. 
 
But, all of this is just my opinion.  I could be wrong.  
 
 

A friend of mine asked me to share my thoughts about The Life & Times of Snuffy Wilson; more specifically, how I felt about the project while it was in the works and how I feel about it now.  A seemingly easy request, but one for which I just haven’t had the time or inclination until now.  So, off we go.
 
The project was fun, of course.  I usually manage to enjoy myself while I’m working on music in some way, shape or form.  There are always songs that prove to be more difficult to record than I anticipate while they’re being written.  This time there was really only one; Need to be Free.  Its guitar part involves a deceptively complex fingerpicking pattern that was much faster when I first heard it in my head.  I practiced it like I do any piece of music that gives me trouble.  I started at a tempo where I could play the part competently and gradually increased the speed until I got to a point where I wanted the piece to live.  I *always* use a metronome for this process and usually work for 3 – 8 minutes at a specific speed before I try to go faster…usually for no more than 30 – 45 total minutes on any one part on any given day.  It’s a valuable process taught at Musician’s Institute.  Granted, I wound up with a slower tempo than I anticipated, but I think it gives the song more room to breathe.  It’s probably right about where it should be. 
 
This was a first for me in that I was assuming a role for these songs.  Usually, my songs are intensely personal and are about me or how I view things.  I sometimes tell a story about other folks, but that seems pretty rare.  For this collection, I was writing about and performing as a fictional bluesman of my own creation.  Yes, there’s plenty of me in Snuffy Wilson, but I’m not him.  I haven’t had his successes or a number of his failures and I have not made the same choices along the way.  It could be that I wrote about how I thought things might have gone for me under a specific set of circumstances; I’m really not sure.  I can say this character was inspired by a single song, Never Got Along, which was in turn inspired by a week I spent with Guy Davis, interacting with him and watching him perform for children and adults during a Blues In the School program…schools during the day, different venues at night. It was a fantastic week for me.  Guy was one of my favorite artists long before I met him and our relationship has developed to the point where he has referred to me as “family.”
 
Yeah, that feels good.
 
So, Never Got Along inspired Snuffy Wilson.  One night before a gig it occurred to me that the song might have more to say.  I spent some time thinking about it and improvised the basic story that exists now as an introduction on stage.  Of course, the story has gotten more involved, but the idea came from that one premise.  I pulled one other existing song, Big Bad Man, as an example of what Snuffy was during his younger years because I thought it fit seamlessly.  The other ten songs were all written as the project unfolded.  There’s some really deep stuff going on and I like it a lot.  I had initially planned to record the whole thing and release it as an album, but I was having difficulty getting it done.  The songs just weren’t coming together the way I knew they should.  So, I went back to the process I used for Twenty Aught Eight, but instead of doing a new song every week, I chose to do one every two weeks.  I felt like I needed that extra week to give the material just a bit more attention.  I also seem to work well with self-imposed deadlines…as long as I make them public knowledge and hold myself accountable. 
 
By the time I got to each song, I knew how I wanted it to sound and I’m pretty proud of the results.  I think my voice took another jump forward, in no small part due to advice received from a new friend and fellow Calexican, Dan Navarro.  My guitar playing…well, here’s the deal.  I feel like I’m always improving and while I can do some things really well, there are lots of guys out there who can play circles around me.  And you know what?  I’m ok with that.  I do what I do.  Folks will react or they won’t, and the older I get, the less I care.  I freely admit that as a young man, I figured the words “Rock Star” would be in my job description.  Yeah, I gave up any hope of that happening many moons ago  (ok, I maintain the slimmest of hopes) and have geared myself towards being able to make a living playing my music.
 
That might be the hardest part.  My music.  I’m not interested in being a working musician in a cover band, or in being a long-term sideman.  I want to be appreciated and earn a living with my art.  Whether nor not it happens really isn’t the point anymore; now it’s about doing what I want and getting better at it.  If I happen to find a way to make a reasonable living, I’ll be unbelievably thankful and grateful.  In the meantime, I have a loving wife, a reasonable source of income, some nice instruments & tools, and both the time & desire to keep going.  So I do. 
 
But, I digress.  I knew how I wanted the songs to sound and I got damn close on all of them.  While I was working, I was happy with the overall sound and quality of the recordings.  That means both voice & guitar.  I think there’s some great work on this collection and am particularly proud of the vocals on I’m Getting’ Old, but each song can really stand on its own.  However…
 
…something that was unexpected during this process…a fan and friend of mine, Joyce Jordan, informed me that I absolutely had to record the introductions to each of these songs.  You see, I played 4 of these tunes at this gig, complete with intros.  At the time, it was my intention to do an album with just the songs themselves and reserve the spoken words for live performances.  She was adamant that they should be part of the CD.  After giving it some thought, I decided she was right.  Looking at it now, I don’t see how this album could exist without them.  Those transitional pieces are vital to the story.   Thank you, Joyce. 
 
Oh, back to assuming a role for these songs for a moment…the spoken introductions/transitional pieces were helped by my experience with the role of Jacob Marley for a radio production of A Christmas Carol.  Some of the direction I received applied quite nicely to my own stuff. 
 
As for how I feel about these songs now, I guess I’ve already kind of covered that.  But, I can say this.  My current plan is to go back to producing a new recording every couple of weeks after the New Year.  I have two songs written, but have decided to do a collection of cover songs first.  Yeah, that kind of goes against everything I say I want from music, but I think it might be a good exercise to try on material from other people and see what I can do with it.  I have a few songs in mind – I’ll start with While My Guitar Gently Weeps – but I have not yet selected the total of 10 I plan to record. 
 
In hindsight, I’d say that one of the reasons I decided to go ahead with cover songs is because The Life & Times of Snuffy Wilson took quite a bit out of me, creatively speaking.  I may need some time before I go back to the creative well, so to speak, and I may take longer than the approximately 20 weeks the next project will require.  I may go back and revisit some of my own songs and treat them to a new recording.  Some of them really deserve it.
 
Besides, in all honesty, I think I need a bit of distance from this project before I start writing again.  This was an emotional event.
 

I forgot to post an entry here the last time I put a song up, but "I'm The King" was made available on 7/27/10, and "When Liza Cries" went live moments ago.
 
Y'all take care.
 

Song #2 from The Life & Times of Snuffy Wilson is up and available for listening on the music page of my web site, as well as my profiles on Facebook & Myspace.  Snuffy wrote & played this when he was 22.  He was young, full of himself, and possibly not as good as he believed.
 
Enjoy.
 
 

The first song of The Life & Times of Snuffy Wilson has been completed and is available for listening and purchase.  Click the Music menu button on your left for more information.
 
Y'all take care.
 

So, here's what I'm doing next.  In 2008, I worked on something called Twenty Aught Eight, during which I posted a new song every week for a year.  I had a lot of fun doing it and looking back, I was happier than I had been in a long time.  So with that in mind, I've decided to do something similar.

I'm going to post a new recording every *two* weeks for as long as I can.  I'm leaving the length of the project open ended because I honestly don't have a specific time frame in mind, and I'm going with every couple of weeks because I want to be able to devote more time to each song than seven days allows.  I also want to be able to take a few gigs should the right ones come along, which means I have to give myself sufficient time to rehearse.  

There is one other thing about this project that will be different; I'm allowing for the possibility of collaboration once I have met my deadline.  Here's what I have in mind.  

I've made the switch from recording with a Boss BR-1180CD to using Garage Band on my MacBook.  I figure this makes sharing tracks with those who might be willing to contribute pretty easy.  So, my current idea is to complete a song with whatever instrumentation I see fit - whether that's just guitar and voice or multiple instruments will depend entirely on the song - post it prior to my deadline, and then make the Garage Band file downloadable for anyone who might want to see what they can do.   This could be adding another instrument, adding harmony vocals, replacing the existing parts...whatever works.  Of course, I'd want to hear the results.  If whoever contributes is willing to share the results with the rest of the world, so much the better.  If you'd prefer to keep it between us, well, I suppose that's ok too.  

Those of you who don't use software or hardware that is compatible with Garage Band files are free to use mp3 files.  

In terms of collaboration and potential income, bear in mind that I will own all of these songs.  I will own the Copyright and will use this Creative Commons in conjunction with each song and the project as a whole:
 
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-sa/3.0/
 
Should something you do with my song somehow create some big financial windfall or the opportunity for one, we can discuss a suitable arrangement.  For example, if you should happen to change the lyrics and melody for one of my songs but keep the chord progression and/or the instrumental tracks (or vice versa), we can come to some sort of agreement if the chance for income arises.   But, if you just add some instrumental tracks - say a guitar, violin, fiddle, mandolin, or banjo part - I will happily give you credit, but I will own the copyright for the song itself.   
 
Think of it this way.  You're a guitar player.  Willie Nelson hears your band in a bar somewhere and is so impressed by your chops that he wants you to play on a couple of tracks on his new album.  He's Willie Nelson, so he can afford to play you for your time - say, union scale - and you get credit for any contribution you make to the finished product.  However, you do not get a share of album sales or any income generated by the songs.  

But, during the recording sessions, you hear Willie playing a cool chord progression and humming a neat little melody to go with it.  You ask him what it is, and he replies that it's a new song that has yet to be completed.  You two start trading ideas, one thing leads to another and the next thing you know, you and Willie have written a song together.  You reach an agreement and you get a share of income generated by that particular song.  

Or, let's say that you happen to come up with a bridge to an existing song that Willie decides to add in.  Or, you wind up talking about the lyrics and melody of a tune, and again, one thing leads to another and Willie winds up changing the song because of your cool ideas.  In either case, you should get some of the income made by songs to which you have now co-written.  

I'm not comparing myself to Willie Nelson; I'm just trying to make a point.  Using the above examples as a guide, I can *not* afford to pay anyone who wants to have some fun adding some accompaniment to my music.  However, if we wind up collaborating on new songs, I will happily share income.  

First up will be the completion of a collection of songs called The Life & Times of Snuffy Wilson.  I was actually hoping to have this done back in April, but it just hasn't happened.  There will be a total of 12 songs, 10 of which are new.  The remaining 2 were written during Twenty Aught Eight.  "Never Got Along" inspired the story about Snuffy and "Big Bad Man" fit right into the plot.  

Once those songs have been finished, I'm not entirely certain about what will come next.  A few months ago, I had intended to redo some of the songs from 2008, and then move on to revamping most of my instrumental material...so maybe that's what will happen.  Or, I might just get started with new stuff.  We shall see.  Another difference between this project and Twenty Aught Eight is that for the latter, I wrote something new every week; this will just require a new recording.  
 
The deadline will be 11:59 PM every other Monday, with the first song being made available no later than 7/5/10.  

As for a name, I'll just call it Ongoing for now.  I'm open to change on that.

And...off we go!